Dec 27 2018
North Pole- The word is out! Due to an "unpublished dilemma" last Christmas Eve Santa has gone Low Carb!
Sources reveal that Santa was stuck in a chimney somewhere in California for over an hour last Christmas Eve - how embarrassing! The incident certainly wreaked havoc with his jolly schedule for the most important night of the year. In the aftermath, it caused Santa to really stop and think.
After careful consideration - Santa and Mrs. Claus decided they could not risk a repeat of the incident, but more importantly the risk factors associated with Santa's health - oh my! Right after the holidays, Santa visited his primary care physician for a complete physical. A "new lifestyle" was decided upon - It's the "Low Carb Lifestyle" for Santa!
Santa has Changed His Mind - Changed His Heart - and is Losing Weight for Life! Will this make Santa "less jolly"? Absolutely not! Fat is not what makes Santa jolly! His weight goals are not to be a skinny "Twiggy Santa" but rather a "healthy weight Santa" with less inches (for some VERY obvious reasons). The keyword here though for Santa is: HEALTH!
Our sources tell us that Santa has more energy than ever, his creativity and staying power seem to be at an all time high! He has hired more elves this season just to keep up with him! The jolly fellow is even less stressed this season.
The absence of stress seems to be relative to the fact that his chances of losing his jolly lifestyle to diabetes, heart disease and obesity have been considerably reduced by his new choice of a healthy eating lifestyle! Santa has serious work to do and HEALTH has become his priority!
In fact, our elf resource reported that we are going to see a big shift in "stocking stuffers" this Christmas. Huge orders are being received and warehoused at the North Pole for "sugar free" candies and low carb treats! Santa's sleigh is going to look like a "sugar free zone" this year!
With Christmas here, as Santa's inches have dropped away, the "sewing elves" are working round the clock in altering Santa's RED wardrobe!
So this Christmas watch for an even "more jolly" Santa and just a "little less" of him but a much healthier and happier Santa 'cause he's gone Low Carb!